I was not a very adventurous kid…meaning I wasn’t the kid who was doing flips off of the high dive at the local community pool or jumped off a cliff with my bike. I’ve never broken a bone, or had stitches, or even had to go to the hospital for anything. I’m guessing that the reason for this is because I was (am) afraid of pain. I don’t like to hurt. It’s not comfortable, and if it can be avoided, then why not? This could also be the reason why I’m not into working out, and it’s beyond me why people would do things like run marathons. Because at some point, there is pain involved. So that is why the last 24 hours have been hard on me.
Let me explain. This kid is already getting on my nerves. It’s a pain in my ass, literally. OK…more specifically, I think that it is hanging out on my sciatic nerve.
With my cold and this weird tooth pain I’ve been having, now I have to deal with not being able to walk sometimes. Stairs? A challenge. Putting lotion on my legs? Made me cry this morning. My knees have buckled, turning over in bed is a serious debate in my head over whether it’s worth it. And there is nothing that can be done. And it’s possible that this will last for three. more. months.
When I got the flu around 14 weeks, I was afraid that it wasn’t the flu, that it was morning sickness kicking in late, and that I would be sick for the next 6 months with projectile vomiting and constant, non-stop nausea. (and yes, I know that the definition of constant is non-stop…but I wanted to make sure that you knew exactly what I meant). Turns out it was just the flu, and within a couple of weeks I felt relatively normal again.
So I am hoping that this ass pain is going to be the same. I just can’t do it for the next 3 months. I know that childbirth is terrible pain, and so obviously I’ll have to deal with that when the time comes. But until then? I guess maybe it’ll make me tougher, as my husband says. It’s hard to imagine getting used to the sharp, stabbing pains that are in my ass. Although I have gotten used to the dull ache that’s been there for about a month or so. So who knows? Maybe I’ll just deal with it and move on. But for today, I’d really like to just curl up in a ball and cry. Wait, can’t do that. Maybe tomorrow…