Friday, March 16, 2012

Comfort-the Gold Standard

When I was in middle school, my godmother who also happened to be my aunt gave me a beautiful little pillow. It had a purple silk pillowcase with my name embroidered on it. I loved it. But to be honest, it was sort of flat and not that comfortable to use as an actual pillow and so it really just sat as decoration on my bed. Although as difficult middle school years transitioned into difficult high school years, I found myself cuddling with that pillow whenever I needed a little sob session or reassurance that someone really did love me. 

That little every once in a while habit turned into an every night habit in college. I squished that little pillow into the crook of my arm and soon couldn't fall asleep without it. It soon became a source of contention with Workaholic, as I preferred to snuggle with my little pillow than with him. (Hey, I can't help it that he can't be squished into the nook of my arm!) Whenever we got into an argument, he would prove how angry he was by throwing my little pillow out the bedroom door...which made me more angry that he would "disrespect the pillow." This pattern has gone on for years.

Until now. I think he finally gave up. That pretty little pillow that my aunt gave me all those years ago has become an unrecognizable lump of cotton. The silky purple pillowcase long ago was in tatters and had to be thrown away. I took to putting regular sized pillowcases on it and wrapping up the cotton to sort of resemble something that would be appropriate to sleep with. When I was pregnant with Sam, he bought me a gas station travel sized pillow out of desperation. It actually resembled the size and shape of the original little pillow, but hadn't yet been molded into the perfect arm pillow. However, it was perfect for putting in between my legs when I sleep! Genius! I now have 2 little pillows.

He continued to whine and mock me for the original little pillow, so when I saw the smaller pillow pets, I bought one. And you know what? It is perfect! Other than scratching my face on a piece of Velcro every once in a while, those little pillow pets fit the bill. I bought one for home and one for the cottage in Michigan, just so I didn't have to travel with it anymore. After about a year's worth of use though, the soft and cuddly small pillow pet wasn't as soft. So I asked for a new one for Christmas. Ask and you shall receive!

Are you keeping track here? There is the original little pillow, the gas station pillow, the first small pillow pet, and now the second small pillow pet. (Not to mention the two small pillow pets that we got Sam and Charlie for Christmas as well.)  And here is the thing. I might have missed the boat when it comes to replacing the little pillow. Rather, each new pillow is an addition to the collection. On or around my bed there are various colors, shapes and sizes of small pillows that are just right to fit into the nook of my arm. I just can't bring myself to throw away the tattered, pathetic, old pillows...they were so good to me!

Workaholic fought me on this issue until a few weeks ago. It was then that I brought home an old gold blanket from my mom's house. It was one that had been on my bed all throughout my childhood. I am sure that at some point it was warm. But not anymore. Now, it is a '70s gold blanket that is thin and the soft satin on the edge is no longer soft, but actually kind of scratchy. To be honest, if I think about it, the whole thing is kind of scratchy. But I love it.

I curl my feet into the bottom and pull the top up over my little pillow and snuggle in for a good night's sleep. I feel safe and warm (as long as I have the comforter over me too) and the distinctive but not terrible smell of the gold blanket lulls me to sleep. With the exception of Sam waking me up almost every night wanting to crawl into bed, I've had the best sleep I've had in years the past few weeks. (OK, maybe not, but whatever, I love that gold blanket.)

What is your comfort item? The one (or three) thing(s) that is torn and tattered but it would just kill you to throw away?


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