Monday, March 22, 2010

Sugar Monster

You know how when you are pregnant that everyone assumes you have crazy cravings, like Mike N Ike’s on a banana sandwich with jelly and pickels as a side? Yeah…not me. I’m such a boring pregnant person that my doctor makes up conversations just to fill up the 10 minute appointment time, (we spent most of my last one talking about snowmobiles and boats) and I honestly think that Workaholic forgets that I am with child half of the time. He never understands why I am so tired all of the time, and if I have an angry outburst he just says, “It’s really too bad that you don’t love me. If you did, you wouldn’t be so mean to me.” (He really knows how to play off of the Catholic guilt) (Then again, if he wouldn’t piss me off, then I wouldn’t have to yell at him! Why can’t he just understand that??)

It has come to my attention that I actually do have a craving. No, it’s not watermelon or pickles or licorice or tea. It’s sugar. Plain and simple. I want sugar. Whether it’s in the form of M&M’s (my current snack of choice), or ice cream bars (when it’s 30 degrees outside) or Fun Dips. I love sugar. I’m afraid this kid is going to come out spinning on its head and demanding to be mainlined a steady stream of pure, white, beautiful sugar cane. (Which, BTW, is brown. Who knew??)

I’ve always loved sugar, when I was a little kid I used to climb up on the countertop and just pour straight sugar into my mouth from the canister. I would use strawberries as an excuse in the summertime to get to eat more sugar. Mmm….sugar. I love it. Sorry to be so boring in my cravings, but at least it’s easy. Workaholic does NOT have to make any midnight trips to Taco Bell, which is probably a good thing. He doesn’t do Mexican so well.

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